Thinking Outside the Box

At a routine checkup a while back, the doctor gave me a flier inviting me to come hear a psychologist wax eloquent on the 7 different personality/behavioral traits of children ages 2-7. Reading through the list of diverse characteristics that this professor would be discussing really put my hackles up. The thought of having a complete stranger - PhD not withstanding - tell me, without ever having met my children, into which stereotypical box I needed to place my kids was rather infuriating.

I know my children better than anyone else, and I DON'T want someone else slapping labels on them, I grumbled to myself. I left the doctor's office without the slightest intention of ever attending such a meeting and tried my best to conceal from the doctor my scorn for the idea.

The funny thing about these situations is that I inevitably become guilty of the very thing for which I judge others. This time would prove to be no exception.

As we began this school year, I had some preconceived ideas of how things would go and how the kids would each handle this new learning environment. For example, I assumed that T, with his exceptionally clear speech and methodical logic, would excel noticeably over K, who speaks with a substantial lisp and who is much more sullen and subdued than his older, louder counterpart.

Was I ever in for a surprise! One day early on I asked T to read through his 5 sight words. He took his sweet time in doing so, and apparently K had had enough of wasting time and blurted out all five words in less than a second, much to T's surprise and embarrassment. K also has much more motivation than does T, and K is the one who routinely finishes his assignments first. I had really expected it to be the other way around.

Something else I wasn't entirely prepared for was the depth of T's understanding. Since he often jabbers on about anything that pops into his head just for the sake of making noise, I wasn't prepared for the deep level his curiosity reaches. He wants to know every state, country, and ocean on his globe (praise the Lord for the wise globe makers who wrote out all those names instead of leaving me to guess!). Today, he had me show him a drawing of the organs in a human body because he wanted to know just where, exactly, his stomach was, how it was attached to his esophagus, and how the large and small intestines aid in digestion. When I was his age, I don't think I even knew that those internal parts existed! Other things he's been interested in are a working engine, an atomic bomb, and simple scientific reactions. All I can say is that I'm very, very grateful for an extremely knowledgeable husband...and for Youtube when Daddy's not home to explain. :)

While I still despise the thought of "labeling" children or placing them in a "box," I've realized that placing my own labels or assumptions on them isn't any better than having a psychologist do it. I still have expectations for each child, but I'm also trying to be open to each one's strengths and weaknesses. Apparently, I wasn't as knowledgeable about them as I would have first thought! I guess this was a perfect example of how home schooling isn't just for the purpose of educating the children of the home. It's a complete family-learning scenario.

So now, I wonder, what will L be like once she hits kindergarten? I can't wait to find out!