Unveiling the Facade

Last month, the kids and I drove to a park to spend the afternoon in the intermittent sunshine. While there, a little girl not much older than L began picking on children on the playground. When we decided to head home. the little girl followed us away from the park, across a vast ball field, and all the way into the parking lot without her mother's notice. I repeatedly admonished her to return to her mother, but she had no intention of heeding my recommendations. Finally, her older brother - who could have only been 3 1/2 at most - came to drag her back to her family. At this point, the little girl took off shrieking through the parking lot, dodging cars as she did so, and made a deliberate bee-line for the highway on the other side. Horrified, I took off after her to prevent the worst from taking place. About the time I caught her, her mother mercifully showed up and took over.

In the car on the way home, T inquired about this child's behavior. He was shocked that she would behave in such a disrespectful manner. Realizing this was an unexpected opportunity to teach a valuable lesson, I pounced on the moment.

"T, are you any better than that little girl who disobeyed?"

"Oh, yes, Mommy. I'd never do that!"

"No, honey, we are no better than that little girl. If Mommy and Daddy had not taught you to behave differently, you would have done the exact same thing."

I really think my response caught him off guard. And it isn't always toddlers who think that they are better than the kid next door. It is so easy to get caught up in the "I'm better" attitude on many issues, not just behavioral ones.

Sometimes I find myself thinking, "I'm so glad I'm doing the 'right' thing by teaching my children at home." But then images of the puffed up Pharisee in the Bible come to mind: he sat there judging the sinner while he himself had a completely ungodly attitude.

Home schooling is the right choice - for us. I know of certain situations where home schooling is NOT the right choice for others. I know wives whose husbands husbands do not want to home school. Even though home schooling may be a good thing, to do so against your husband's wishes is not the best choice. (Several husbands have changed their minds after much prayer on the wives' parts.) I know of single mothers who have a 9-5, weekday job. Home schooling for them is not currently an option. And there are other situations where, indeed, home education is not practical or desirable.

Whenever someone asks my opinion on the subject, I highly recommend home schooling. I truly do want others - okay, everyone! - to experience the joy that home schooling can bring. Life is not perfect, though, and neither is educating one's children at home. It's not going to guarantee that the kids "turn out right." It certainly is not going to save them - only God can do that. But what it can do is lay a firm foundation for Godly principles so that we as parents can do all we can to prepare our children for adulthood.

I've heard home schooling promoted as the antidote to the world's problems; I've also heard it called the mask that hides each family's shortcomings. In truth, it is neither. It is a tool that we and many others are using as we raise these precious gifts from God. For us, it's our way of trying to do everything we can to ensure that our children follow the Lord while praying in faith that He will ultimately draw their hearts to Him.

Home schooling bears many unnecessary titles and expectations that can lead to its failure. Having the right perspective, though, will help it become the aid that we want it to be.

Wisdom for the Ages

My children's uncanny ability to embarrass me - especially in public - never ceases to amaze me. Occasionally, these episodes even cause me to wonder why it was that I ever considered motherhood. But then, every once in a blue moon, one of my little spark plugs will do or say something that reminds me EXACTLY why I love being a mom. Today's Bible lesson produced one such moment.

The kids and I were reading from our daily devotional, and the phrase "Know God, grow in God" was used. Many times, when I read Bible truths to the kids, I get discouraged because uncomprehending, glassy eyes stare back at me with a blank expression that reads, "I totally did not hear one word you just read, Mom." I wasn't sure that today's lesson had been understood, either, until T blurted out,

"To 'know God' means that I know His name. To 'grow in God' is wisdom."

It is for these priceless and profound insights that I live.

Stone Soup

As a child, I heard the story of Stone Soup, where many different people each contribute something to the stock pot and the end result is a delicious dinner that no one person could have made without the help of others. As an adult, I can see how this idea plays out in our home schooling efforts. I cannot adequately teach my children without the love and support of many, many other people.

If it weren't for my husband's desire and encouragement, I would never be able to complete the home schooling course before me. Were it not for veteran home schoolers - who have already tread the same stretch of racetrack - guiding me and cheering me on, I would fall off course. If it weren't for friends who are in the same place in life, I would drown in loneliness. Yes, home schooling is truly a group effort!

I've already shared a little about our small co-op that meets once a month, and this past Friday we had another gathering. I was reminded again just how beneficial working together is when undertaking the task of educating children at home.

One of the other moms taught a fantastic lesson on light. This was great, not only for the kids, but also for me. First of all, it gave me a much-needed break from teaching. Secondly, I got to see just how she chose to teach: lots of hands-on activities, multiple reinforcement experiments, and various methods of explanation. I came away with many new ideas to try at home!

After our light lesson (and after enjoying lunch and celebrating a birthday), we all walked over to a nearby organic farm. Since it was about a half mile away, this afforded physical exercise and fresh air for us all; visiting time between the moms; and proper street-crossing etiquette for the kids. Once at the farm, we saw beautiful chickens (prior to this visit, I would never have thought of fowl as beautiful, but these birds were truly exquisite and clean!), toured a green house, climbed dirt "mountains," and viewed a large tractor up close. It was a child's paradise!

The whole day was a perfect reminder of how working together can create something much richer than anything I can do on my own. We don't have to meet every day, but by working together, we all benefit from one another.

It was a most delicious stone soup day.

Reading Between the Lines

Over all, our home schooling experience has been fantastic. I love the flexibility, the joy, and the excitement that home education brings. There was an area where questions still plagued me, though:

Into which grades should we place the boys?

This was a huge hang-up for me. Over and over I've been told that, especially with boys, it's better to start late rather than early, but both Jon and I graduated early and we like some of the advantages that come with that. To confuse matters even more, T's birthday is December 2nd, which is considered by the government to be the "cut-off" date between grades. I don't even know what that means. Are kids with 12/02 birthdays supposed to go into the higher grade or the lower?

I was truly confused. On the one hand, the perks of having an extra year in between high school and college was appealing. It was then that Jon got his first car, acquired his driver's license, and started his first job. During that extra year, I took junior college courses that both prepared me for a 4-year university and gave me transferable credits that counted toward my chosen major. On the flip side of all of that, I didn't wan the boys to struggle through school in an attempt to stay a year ahead of their similarly-aged counterparts.

Part of my dilemma stemmed from my errant belief that California had set standards for each grade level that students were required to complete before moving to the next grade. (I had completely forgotten about a public school teacher whose class was 50% illiterate.) My mom reminded me that most children are ahead of their grade level in some areas and behind in others. Currently, the both of the boys are blurring the lines between grade levels.

Ultimately, I came to the conclusion that it doesn't really matter what grade I fill in on the affidavit next year. I simply need to teach the kids at levels where they progress but don't struggle, and these levels will vary from subject to subject. And since Jon had a preference of putting T in First Grade this year, that's what we're doing. If T's not ready to graduate after he's finished 12th grade, we can always spend another year finishing up, and if he is ready, it will give him the extra time to prepare for college.

Although I've really mastered this art of making mountains out of mole hills, especially with home schooling, learning to go with the flow is yet another positive by-product of our home education experience. Really, I think I'm learning WAYYYY more than the boys are right now.

I wouldn't want it any other way.

Something Old, New, Borrowed, and...Green?

I promised a while ago to give my input on the various curriculum types we've used. Until now, I haven't felt ready to do that, mostly because I wanted to give everything a good, fair trial before offering my thoughts. As I've mentioned before, we use what we're given, so we've been privileged to sample a wide variety of books and styles. We have curriculum old and new, and we've borrowed lots of books from the library and other sources. I was most excited, though, to be given a set of Bob Jones University's reading program - the same one I grew up with, and what I affectionately called my "green" reader (they're green from 1st through 12th grades).

I'll just list out what we have and give some feedback for each.

Preschool:

Winter Promise Unit Studies - This set comes with several non-consumable craft and science books, manipulatives, and a Bible stories book. Over all, I really liked it. It has a teacher's guide complete with lesson plans, which was great for me since I hate prep work. The only thing I didn't like is that it bounced around all of the books instead of moving through each one in an orderly fashion. We'll continue using some of the activities throughout our home school experience.

Usborne Phonics Cards, Alphabet Book, and Prewriting Skills - I love this set. I chose to photocopy the prewriting skills pages so that I could use the book for all of the kids instead of letting one child use it up. The flash cards are great, and we take them along with us when we're running errands and the kids need something to do.

Kindergarten:

Bob Jones University Press (BJUP) K5 Program - This is the curriculum that I largely grew up with, so I was thrilled when I was given a complete, brand-new set. It has three sections, and the first was definitely my favorite. After that, K seemed to lose interest, and he's struggling with the smallish font when trying to read words. I love the pre-cursive writing that is taught.

Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons - At first glance, this method looked really confusing. There are big squares between each word, dots underneath each letter, and directional arrows below each sentence. That said, it's K's preferred phonics text, and he can read quite well. Once we began the lessons, all of the above-mentioned marks now make sense and actually aid his reading instead of distracting from it. This method also worked for my younger brother who really struggled with reading. The large font is perfect for little eyes, too.

Funnix - We found a link to download this for free, so I thought I'd share. The link will expire the 31st of January, so hurry if you're interested! We've not used this yet, but since it's computer-based, I'm assuming the boys will love it.

http://moneysavingmom.com/2011/01/educational-freebie-free-funnix-downloadable-childrens-reading-program-249-value.html

BJUP Math - This has lots of colorful pages, and K really enjoys it. As a teacher, I found some of the concepts a little difficult to comprehend.

Mortenson Math and Cuisinaire Rods - This simple mathematics course has been lots of fun, and the boys and I both like it. I do wish it had more subtraction, though; thus far, we've only encountered counting and addition.

First Grade:

BJUP English/Reading Skills - I was really excited to have this set as well. I grew up with BJUP's "green" readers, so I loved the thought of using them with my own kids. However, I found the numerous texts, charts, teacher's manual, and workbooks to be overwhelming. After a few weeks, we finally found a workable rhythm, but I skip a lot of the exercises since many seem to be merely busywork instead of helpful for instruction. As much as I loved them when growing up, we've decided to alter our course for next year since the boys learn differently than I did. I do love the in-depth-ness (is that a word?) of the BJUP curriculum; there is a lot more to it than several other same-grade publishers. I think it is laying an excellent foundation from which to springboard into something a little different.

I am truly grateful for all we've been given! Whether it's new, used, borrowed, or green, we've been able to use everything given to us. Next year, we'll be trying out The Weaver unit studies at the recommendation of my mom-in-law. It looks really good, so perhaps I'll post an update on that once we've tried it out.

The best thing about curriculum is that there is so much of it available. If something doesn't work for your family or your child, there's always something else to try! We are truly blessed to be home schooling in this day and age. Although there are more stringent laws to deal with, there are also a lot more choices. Happy hunting!

The Trouble With Toddlers

Unless there is only one child in the home or siblings are spaced 20 years apart, chances are that most home school families are going to run into a problem that I'm facing.

What do you do with disruptive toddlers while trying to educate older siblings?

I'm still trying to figure this one out, but here is what I tried first: giving her WeBlittle pumpkins and gourds from our recent pumpkin patch trip. This lasted about five minutes until she tried eating the small, green gourd. Based on her facial expression after the first taste, I'm going to guess it was pretty bitter. :)

Next up was giving her manipulatives - these were a special treat since she's usually not allowed to have them. These entertained her for an afternoon, but the following day she was bored again.

I tried other engaging things like puzzles, play-doh (which she ate), color crayons (which she chewed up - do you sense a theme here?), and felt boards. I realized that she was much happier and much more willing to sit content when she was doing what she saw her big brothers do. For us, our best toddler-taming strategy has been to include her right along with the boys. When we do Bible time, I insist she sit in my lap and listen. When T does his reading exercises and K is permitted to use the DoodlePro, L is happy drawing on the DoodlePro, too. Now, she anticipates that activity, and as soon as T's Green Reader makes an appearance, she toddles off and drags out the DoodlePros. It's really cute!

A new thing we're doing in the evenings is playing educational games before bed. Even though L has no concept of what's truly happening, as long as we give her a piece of the game to play with, she's a happy camper.

This is what's working for us for right now. It's having positive results other than keeping her occupied, too. By teaching her to sit still during our "Together Time" (often called "Circle Time" by other families), she's learning to sit still in church. She's learning, to a degree, the songs that I'm teaching the boys, sounds to certain letters, and how to behave while I need to give my attention to someone other than herself.

Each family structure is different, and this probably would not work with a baby/toddler younger than mine. There are lots and lots of ideas and possibilities for keeping track of toddlers while teaching older children, and we're enjoying researching and trying some of them in our own family.

Toddlers can be troubling and trying, but they can also be a blessing and a joy. In the trials of toddlers, remember: they're simply helping Mommy be more creative with the resources on hand (hence the pumpkin idea)!!

Learning in Leisure

Christmas break was a welcome respite from our school books, which had magically transformed from intriguing and welcome opportunities to boring objects of disdain. What amazed me most about our two-week book sabatical was how much we actually learned away from the printed page. Suddenly, T took a renewed interest in Bible time (the one thing we kept somewhat steady during the break); K wanted more than ever to spend time creating works of art; and both boys begged for colored paper, foam stickers, and craft supplies. Where these interests had disappeared to during the preceding weeks was a mystery to me, but it was great that they were so easily entertained while I attempted to catch up on home projects.

I noticed as the days passed that I started to catch up on dishes and laundry (though somehow I didn't find time to clean the bathrooms). It was a really nice feeling, but I also realized that simply accomplishing those two daily chores took nearly all of my free time...and that was without school! Understanding the uphill battle that I face with school work, house work, child care, and other necessities helped me to try to set more realistic goals for the second half of the school year.

Additionally, it dawned on me that not only do the the boys learn a lot from what I read to them, but they also retain much of what I read. T doesn't like the busyness of workbooks, but both boys love reading, being read to, and doing hands-on activities. It was amazing how clear all of this became simply by taking a break and stepping back to assess our progress thus far.

I really hadn't expected to learn much of anything over the break, but in fact, I learned (or finally realized) quite a lot! It will help us as we plunge ahead into the second half of the school year. I better understand what works and what doesn't, and we can try new things to see if some will work better than what we were doing originally.

Most importantly, I was able to see just how needed a break from textbooks was. The Heavenly Father rested on the 7th day; He designed us to need rest each night; and, at times, we need rest from our normal routines. Even if the boys aren't too thrilled about hitting the books again, my Mommy Batteries were energized, and I'm excited about the new mountains we'll be climbing this year.

Grab your gear, kiddos! It's gonna be fun!